Words: Rob DeStefano


I join the majority when I say that I am, now more than ever, skeptical of this DC comics amalgam, helmed by the notorious Zack Snyder. If Man of Steel wasn’t enough to deter you from ever looking at a red cape again, the unlikely Ben Affleck addition was sure to raise skepticism for its sequel. These warnings were followed by a flurry of bizarre posters, the superheroes standing in the middle of – I still don’t know, volcanoes? Man of Steel was a tonal disaster, the camera work suggesting a gritty and grounded story, the story suggesting the opposite of something grounded. The latest Batmobile phtograph confirms that this movie will bring us only farther away from Nolan’s trilogy. The proportions on this vehicle are quite telling: tiny, impractical headlights sized against an obstructive turreted Gatling gun. If the one hour city desecration scene from the first installment didn’t scream “Aggressive directing,” this new weapon fixture should fire the message right into our skulls. On discussing this highly “anticipated” superhero merge, Snyder might have stated, “I’m going to make it Bat Shit Crazy! (…Bat…Get one of the screenwriters over here!)” Meanwhile, Nolan is off directing something of substance, hoping, “Gee, I hope no one uses Bat Shit Crazy in front of Zack.” And the people at craft services are starting to realize that the production designer can’t stop watching Dante’s Peak. That’s all for now.

dawn of justice

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